Cats: The Most Cuddly Carnivorous Pet a Man Can Have

Since I was a kid, I have had a love-hate relationship with cats. Most feline exchanges would play out the same way. I would go to pet the cat. “Hey, cat. I’m just trying to pet you,” I would say. For some reason, it seems like this warning should prepare the cat for physical affection. Cats seem to love physical affection. They also love paper bags and scratching furniture, but that’s a whole different story. “You will pet me over my cold, dead, lifeless body,” the cat would reply. Then the cat would run away and look at me, licking its privates just to punctuate its feelings for me. Nevertheless, I would not give up. I would allow that cat enough time to finish its private grooming. It’s very rude to interrupt that kind of activity, I would assume. The last think I want to do at this point is offend the cat I am trying to pet. “Okay, for real this time, cat. I’m just going to pet,” I would say, trying to ease the cat’s mind lest he feel that I am really just trying to hunt and kill him. “I promise it will feel good.” The cat would look at me with its dead, lifeless cat eyes. “I can tell you one thing,” it would say. “It will not feel as good as this!” Then he would bite my hand and run behind some piece of furniture. At this point, I usually give up. Who wants to pet an animal that poops in a box anyway? For the last 25 years of my life, this has happened over and over. (Editor’s note: This may or may not be true as it is very difficult for Nathan to remember the first few years of his life. As far as he is concerned, he has always been able to walk and control his own bowels.) Even my own cat would come and sit next to me then, for no reason, bite my hand. It was his way of sending a warning. “I will sit next to you, but if you so much as lay one finger on me, I will forcefully remove that finger with my teeth.” When my friends got a kitten, I was excited. This was a chance for a fresh start. Kittens have no reason to hate me. They have no preconceived notion that I am trying to ruin their life. I walked up to little Hamish and stuck out a hand. “Hey, Hamish,” I said. He sniffed, then wrapped his paws around my hand and bit me. Every time I saw the cat, he would bite me. I would sit down and see him on the other side of the room. He would notice that my foot or hand were unoccupied, then duck way down against the floor. There he would sit for several minutes, scouting it out. Maybe it was a trap. This could be the time that there was a cat-eating snake hiding behind me, waiting for a chance to have a Hamish-sized snack. After several minutes, figuring that any snake would have gotten bored and either eaten me or left, he would pounce. Across the room he would bound, jumping over furniture and ignoring his forsaken cat toys. He had spotted his prey. It just happened to be one of my extremities. To me, this seemed like a jerk move. I had never once tried to bite the cat. For one, he is hairy and it would take forever to get that cat hair out of my teeth. For another, I have seen the cat eat food. He is not starving to death. Trying to eat my hand is just pure cat gluttony. So, like many other cats before him, I gave up on Hamish. I wrote him off as another in a line of cats that reaffirm why I prefer dogs. Then, today, I sat down on the couch. Much like he has done in the past, Hamish came over. I prepared for the worst. This could be the time that he goes for the throat. I grabbed my phone just in case I needed to make a quick 9-1-1 call. Instead, this happened: Maybe there is hope for cats after all, I thought. Every so often, he would stand and walk up to my face, rubbing against it. A few times, he crawled under my hand to urge a petting. I could be a cat person after all. They are not all bad. Of course, then he bit my hand and ran away. For one second, though, this cat and I were friends. I had hope for the future. Now if cats would just learn that I am not food…

Apple Stock Reaches New All-Time High Following Verdict, Up 1.70% To $674.48 After Hours

pple stock reached a new all-time high as it rose 1.79% to $675.11 in after-hours trading at the time of publication. The stock opened Friday morning at $659.51. A few hours after the market closed on Friday afternoon, a jury in San Jose federal court ruled in favor of Apple in a landmark patent case. Samsung must pay Apple $1,051,855,000 (although that exact figure is being disputed) in damages. While it was not a sweeping win for Apple, as the company was requesting $2.525 billion in damages and did not win all of its infringement claims, it did significantly better than Samsung, which was awarded $0 in damages. Both companies are expected to appeal the decision of the complex case.

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Altria Raises Dividend, Expect 11 More Big Hikes Coming Before Year-End Read more: Altria Raises Dividend, Expect 11 More Big Hikes Coming Before Year-End - 24/7 Wall St. http://247wallst.com/2012/08/24/altria-raises-dividend-expect-11-more-big-hikes-coming-before-year-end/#ixzz24YAW8duv

It was just on Monday that we released the 24/7 Wall St. "12 Big Dividend Hikes Coming Before The End of 2012" and we already have one of the twelve coming true. Altria Group Inc. (NYSE: MO) just delivered on its dividend hike. This is not the last big hike coming. Altria's dividend hike was raised to $0.44 per quarter per share from $0.41... We predicted $0.44 or even $0.45 per share. The problem here is that Altria is paying out so much of its earnings at a time when case volume woes can only be offset by more price hikes. Price hikes are harder and harder to get when states can keep raising taxes collected per pack as well. At least Altria is back to paying 5.25% rather than about 4.8% for a dividend yield. Investors should take today's hike from Altria as a foreshadowing event for its international version Philip Morris International Inc. (NYSE: PM). The international tobacco giant is due for an imminent dividend hike as well and we are targeting the first half of September. For that hike. So, who is next on the dividend hikes? We are about as certain as ever on these and expect at least 8 of these payout hikes to be announced. These include the following: American Electric Power Co. (NYSE: AEP); Amgen Inc. (NASDAQ: AMGN); General Electric Co. (NYSE: GE); Lockheed Martin Corp. (NYSE: LMT); McDonald’s Corp. (NYSE: MCD); Microsoft Corp. (NASDAQ: MSFT); AT&T Inc. (NYSE: T); Verizon Communications Inc. (NYSE: VZ); Walt Disney Co. (NYSE: DIS); and Yum! Brands Inc. (NYSE: YUM).

Top Talent Heads for Exits at Social Media Firms (GRPN, ZNGA, FB, YELP, ANGI, LNKD, SOCL) Read more: Top Talent Heads for Exits at Social Media Firms (GRPN, ZNGA, FB, YELP, ANGI, LNKD, SOCL) - 24/7 Wall St. http://247wallst.com/2012/08/24/top-talent-heads-for-exits-at-social-media-firms-grpn-znga-fb-yelp-angi-lnkd-socl/#ixzz24UNKf5ND

We’ve noted already this morning that Groupon Inc. (NASDAQ: GRPN) has replaced its head of national sales. And a report from Bloomberg notes the departure of four executives from social game maker Zynga Inc. (NASDAQ: ZNGA). Facebook Inc. (NASDAQ: FB) also has seen its share of top talent heading for the door. There could be a few things at work here. One is the poor share price performance at these companies, which extracts a huge toll on stock compensation for many of the social media companies’ top execs. Another is that top talent, especially top technical talent, often exhibits a desire to do its own entrepreneurial thing. A third might be that once the start-up becomes a publicly traded company the culture changes so drastically that top employees figure anywhere else is better. A fourth possibility is that entrepreneurial founders may not be the best leaders of public companies. A fifth reason, of course, is that the executive is not performing and the company points to the door. The high-profile companies also seem to fare a bit worse than those that fly a bit below the mass media radar. Yelp Inc. (NYSE: YELP) shares are down nearly 22% since the company’s IPO, but that is not bad when compared to Facebook or Groupon (down 50%) or Zynga (down 40%) or Angie’s List Inc. (NASDAQ: ANGI) (down 43%). Only LinkedIn Corp. (NYSE: LNKD) (up 40%) has posted a gain. Yelp and Angie’s List, like Facebook, Groupon, and Zynga, recently had to contend with the end of their lock-up periods, and as investors dumped their shares, stock compensation values tanked. Facebook has lost three top executives since its IPO, while neither Yelp nor Angie’s List suffered the executive exodus seen at the other companies. At LinkedIn, the rising stock price has apparently helped keep executives happy. Whatever the reason, the turmoil in the social media companies raises questions about whether or not there’s a there there. Is this a sector that will survive or is it just another bubbly niche that will effervesce for a while before it disappears? The Global X Social Media Index ETF (NASDAQ: SOCL) trades at $12.57 today, in a 52-week range of $11.84 to $16.00. The fund is down about 16% since its IPO in December of 2011. That’s probably because its two largest holdings, Chinese firm TenCent Holdings and LinkedIn, account for nearly a quarter of the fund’s holdings. Paul Ausick

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